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#1 bzmomo7

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 11:44 AM

It has been quite a year for our family.  Last fall we were expecting our 6th son (9th child) and at my 20wk. ultrasound we got the terrible news that our son had anencephaly, a neural tube defect that prevents the proper formation of the skull, and brain, and therefore is uniformly fatal.  Of course, the specialists were gently giving their recommendations of termination.  We told them of our moral convictions and my regular doctor proceeded on as normal.   Before this, I could never have imagined what it would be like to carry a baby you know won't make it.  He was so active, and he was a large baby for his condition--a very muscular 7lbs. 14 oz.  It took several days of induction when I was overdue before he was born, but in it all the Lord was gracious--there was a lot that could have went wrong that didn't.  He passed very peacefully about a minute after he was born.  I had time to whisper to him that I loved him.  He was born on a Sunday morning and we were able to hold him and the preacher came up to the hospital (all of our little congregation in tow) and they packed out my room (yes, the hospital staff were good with this--They were so amazingly supportive.  Many of the nurses I had were professing Christians.) and we had a little service right there and anyone who wanted to look at or hold him could.  My favorite part was the congregation singing Amazing Grace through tears.  I was deeply touched how many of the ladies wanted to pass him around.  (it is not a kind birth defect--but with the top of his little head bundled and his little crocheted hat, all you could see was his little face and chubby cheeks)   He was still our little boy, and the Lord gave his life purpose and meaning that changed our family forever and touched many others lives around us as well.  I never knew how such a hard thing could change me so much.  Even so, I wouldn't wish it on anyone.  He passed away on Jan. 27 of this year, it was bitter-sweet.  It would have been my daddy's birthday.  There were several people praying for him to be healed.  It seemed so strange to me because even though I knew the Lord could heal him, I also have witnessed myself that often the Lord lets us go through the tough stuff sometimes anyway.  I had seen the ultrasound pics myself--twice.  For the Lord to have healed him would have taken a miracle on par with the raising of Lazarus.......there were things MISSING.  I didn't tell anyone, I just let those people pray the way they were, and I began to pray that I would want the Lord to heal our Gabriel, but if He didn't, that my boy's life would not be in vain--and I asked the Lord if He would consider sending me another son in his place as he sent Job additional children for the ones he took during his time of trial.  I never thought that I'd ever request that of the Lord because Gabriel was a surprise, and also because I'm 41.  Well, here I am, it is fall again, and another ultrasound.  The technician acted a little funny yesterday, and I'll admit that we were concerned, but the Lord is so very very merciful, and we are expecting our 7th SON around April 7th of this next spring.  Everything that they could see yesterday they said looked fine.  She said that they didn't get good pictures of the out-flow of his heart because of his position, and that they'll check again in a few weeks but that they didn't think it was a big deal.  (he was being a stinker, and she literally chased him from one side of my stomach to the other for an hour)  Also, the blood chromosome tests they did all come back negative for trisomy/down's.   I was so relieved, I cried.  Even now writing this through tears.  There have been many hard things in my life, but many good as well.  PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



#2 TheSword

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 12:02 PM

What a wonderful testimony. It was quite touching. My wife and I miscarried our first baby (we've had 2 boys since), and that was hard enough. I can't begin to imagine being in your or your husband's shoes through that. It makes me choke up a little bit just thinking about watching one of my boys die right outside the womb. Thank you so much for sharing. God truly is great and merciful.



#3 HappyChristian

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 12:30 PM

:godisgood:  :godisgood:  :godisgood:



#4 swathdiver

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 01:39 PM

You're making me cry!   :godisgood:



#5 candlelight

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 02:27 PM

Bzmomo7, your testimony made my heart heavy and I am beginning to cry.  What an ordeal for you and your family.  God bless you and your family. God took a horrible situation and turned it around into a miracle child.  May your pregancy be blessed.  :preggo:  



#6 bzmomo7

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 02:47 PM

What is really hard to swallow, Candlelight, is that this defect is really common.  1 out of 1000 pregnancies are affected by it.  Over 95% of them are quietly terminated.  I've been there, I understand the hurt, and I understand the feelings that you are so overwhelmed with that you'd love to go bury your head in the sand or run away.........it still isn't right.



#7 quinkie

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 02:48 PM

So sorry for what you went thru. Congratulations on the new baby. God is good - He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. Praying for a healthy baby for you.

#8 John81

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 03:17 PM

Thanks be to God He is ever with us when we go through the dark valleys. My parents lost three children, two still born, one lived for about an hour and a half. Even now I can't fully comprehend the pain. Praise God you were not alone in this.

 

Praying for you and yours and looking forward to next April!



#9 candlelight

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 04:17 PM

Bzmomo7, your testimony made my heart heavy and I am beginning to cry.  What an ordeal for you and your family.  God bless you and your family. God took a horrible situation and turned it around into a miracle child.  May your pregancy be blessed.  :preggo:  

 

John reminded me of something in his post.  I have an older couple that goes to my church.  They just buried their second child.  Thankfully, both girls were saved; however, that doesn't lesson the pain any.  We have been praying for them.  I can't help but think of my only child, who is 22.  He is a wonderful young man.  I just can't imagine how I would go on living if I would lose him.  I have been thinking about that since this couple's daughter's funeral.  *sigh*  My prayers are with you bzmomo7... that our Lord Jesus Christ blesses you, your husband and family with a healthy child. 



#10 bzmomo7

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 06:36 PM

Thanks be to God He is ever with us when we go through the dark valleys. My parents lost three children, two still born, one lived for about an hour and a half. Even now I can't fully comprehend the pain. Praise God you were not alone in this.

 

Praying for you and yours and looking forward to next April!

Thank you.  I'm looking forward to April, too. :D   My sister had a stillbirth and another baby she had died from an infection when he was 7 days old.  She has only one living child.  My husband's parents lost their firstborn son in stillbirth.  The hospitals back then never let his mother grieve, and they quickly whisked him away and she did not get to hold him and they and the family attempted to keep her from going to the funeral....unsuccessfully, thankfully.  I can't imagine losing a child when you expected all to be well.  I knew for five months about our son's condition.  So, we had time to prepare to some degree.  Not that it was better, just different I guess in that we could grieve some ahead of time.  I could never have got through it without the Lord.  His strength was the only thing that kept me going, many times I just would tell myself that I'd just take it one day to a time, and ask God to just get me through the day putting one foot in front of the other.  There was so much uncertainty.  I used to be a terrible worry-wart.  I won't say it is gone completely, but through it all, the Lord worked on my heart and my trust in Him a lot.  There were many times I wished my husband would just tell me that it would be alright, (I was thinking, lie to me, please!!) but I didn't tell him that.  I knew that only God could make it alright, and He, literally, was the only One who could give me reassurance, and the only one who made me feel better when I was down. 



#11 OLD fashioned preacher

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Posted 21 November 2013 - 09:02 PM

I read this to my wife (through the tears) and she cried like a baby.

Though we had 4 of the 5 almost die at one time or another and lost one through influence of family, we never lost one through death.

 

Thanks for allowing the God of all comfort to comfort you and your family that you might be able to comfort them that are in any trouble with the comfort wherewith you were comforted of God.



#12 JerryNumbers

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Posted 23 November 2013 - 08:19 PM

I had a paper folded up on top of my printer, as I moved it as I was going to run off our church bulletins I unfolded it reading it, I though maybe some of you would enjoy it, or maybe some of you've already read it.

 

A Blue Rose
 
Having four visiting family members, my wife was very busy, so I offered to go to the store for her to get some needed items, which included light bulbs, paper towels, trash bags, detergent and Clorox. So off I went.
 
I scurried around the store, gathered up my goodies and headed for the checkout counter, only to be blocked in the narrow aisle by a young man who appeared to be about sixteen-years-old. I wasn't in a hurry, so I patiently waited for the boy to realize that I was there. This was when he waved his hands excitedly in the air and declared in a loud voice, "Mommy, I'm over here."
 
It was obvious now, he was mentally challenged and also startled as he turned and saw me standing so close to him, waiting to squeeze by. His eyes widened and surprise exploded on his face as I said, "Hey Buddy, what's your name?"
 
"My name is Denny and I'm shopping with my mother," he responded proudly.
 
"Wow," I said, "that's a cool name; I wish my name was Denny, but my name is Steve."
 
"Steve, like Stevarino?" he asked. "Yes," I answered. "How old are you Denny?"
 
"How old am I now, Mommy?" he asked his mother as she slowly came over from the next aisle.
 
"You're fifteen-years-old Denny; now be a good boy and let the man pass by."
 
I acknowledged her and continued to talk to Denny for several more minutes about summer, bicycles and school. I watched his brown eyes dance with excitement, because he was the center of someone's attention. He then abruptly turned and headed toward the toy section.
 
Denny's mom had a puzzled look on her face and thanked me for taking the time to talk with her son. She told me that most people wouldn't even look at him, much less talk to him.
 
I told her that it was my pleasure and then I said something I have no idea where it came from, other than by the prompting of the Holy Spirit. I told her that there are plenty of red, yellow, and pink roses in God's Garden; however, "Blue Roses" are very rare and should be appreciated for their beauty and distinctiveness. You see, Denny is a Blue Rose and if someone doesn't stop and smell that rose with their heart and touch that rose with their kindness, then they've missed a blessing from God.
 
She was silent for a second, then with a tear in her eye she asked, "Who are you?"
 
Without thinking I said, "Oh, I'm probably just a dandelion, but I sure love living in God's garden."
 
She reached out, squeezed my hand and said, "God bless you!" and then I had tears in my eyes.
 
May I suggest, the next time you see a BLUE ROSE, don't turn your head and walk off. Take the time to smile and say Hello.
 
Why? Because, by the grace of GOD, this mother or father could be you. This could be your child, grandchild, niece or nephew. What a difference a moment can mean to that person or their family.
 
From an old dandelion! 


#13 woolysheep

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Posted 23 November 2013 - 10:48 PM

Thankyou for sharing. Such strength in faith is most surely an encouragement to others.

 

:godisgood:



#14 JerryNumbers

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Posted 24 November 2013 - 01:19 AM

And thank you, & yes, we have a very wonderful Savior & Father.



#15 bzmomo7

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Posted 10 April 2014 - 01:32 PM

Thought I'd give a quick update..............baby Joseph is here safe and sound!  8lbs. 7 oz.  21"  born on 4-1-14.  Still trying to work through the "newborn phase".....establishing a good milk supply and straightening out his nights/days.   The labor went REALLY well and quickly, to.  Really thankful for our new little blessing from the Lord!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



#16 HappyChristian

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Posted 10 April 2014 - 01:48 PM

Thought I'd give a quick update..............baby Joseph is here safe and sound!  8lbs. 7 oz.  21"  born on 4-1-14.  Still trying to work through the "newborn phase".....establishing a good milk supply and straightening out his nights/days.   The labor went REALLY well and quickly, to.  Really thankful for our new little blessing from the Lord!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:clapping:  :clapping:  :clapping:  :clapping:

 

So happy to hear that. Congrats to you and yours.  God is good!



#17 candlelight

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Posted 10 April 2014 - 03:55 PM

Thought I'd give a quick update..............baby Joseph is here safe and sound!  8lbs. 7 oz.  21"  born on 4-1-14.  Still trying to work through the "newborn phase".....establishing a good milk supply and straightening out his nights/days.   The labor went REALLY well and quickly, to.  Really thankful for our new little blessing from the Lord!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Congratulations bzmomo7 to you and your family on the arrival of baby Joseph.   :baby:



#18 Salyan

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Posted 13 April 2014 - 01:10 AM

Oh, praise The Lord. So glad for you guys. I hadn't read the first part before, so now am crying and smiling for you simultaneously! <3

#19 OLD fashioned preacher

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Posted 13 April 2014 - 05:35 PM

Congrats.






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