Very real scenario:
Two women have lived together for 12 years in a same-sex relationship. They have gone to another state to get legally married and now reside in your state. Through in vitro fertilization and an anonymous sperm donor through a sperm bank, they have conceived and are raising three children, ages 6, 4 and 6 months. They come to your church and would like to join.
What do you do? What do you tell them? What position should the church take on this? This puts two sins in at odds. Homosexuality and divorce. Maybe. Perhaps they have decided to remain celibate. No one has ever asked my wife and I about our sex lives, so should we ask about theirs?
I am curious to know what your advice would be. Here we have three children who are well cared for, love their mothers, and are excelling in every area of life. If you advise them to separate and "divorce" (that is what would occur, no matter what you call it), the children would be harmed. If you advise them to stay together, do you tell them they have to be celibate?
How should the church address same-sex families in these situations? How can the church possibly reach them if we advocate tearing their family apart?
I am friends with a couple in this very situation. I never hear Christians talk about the realities, and am curious as to your thoughts:
1. How do you know this couple is having sex, which is prohibited in the Bible? If they are celibate, are they still sinning?
2. When children and assets are involved, and breaking them up, if you say that is what they must do, how do you decide who gets custody of children? Who gets the house? Who gets money in the bank account?
I'm not interested in a debate as the morality or immorality of same-sex sex. I am interested in the realities of people who are living as families and are legally married, and how the church should address these situations. Do we just turn them away? Do we maintain and respect their families and tell them to abstain from sex?